i. Fuck you.
People say you shouldn’t end things on a bad note
because god forbid you regret it later,
but I think this was the only truth you ever said to me
and i wish I could learn how to mean it right back
even when my hands aren’t shaking,
then maybe it would finally span the miles between these
two lonely islands.
I always knew I was a bit too much for most people
but I never deserved the words you layed out
(or the ones you held back)
and it took me far too long to come to terms with that.
ii. I give up.
I was never much of a quitter because
I never really participated in anything,
but this game has gone on far too long for my liking
and I’m rather tired of shitting around.
I am the worst with goodbyes but
there is something about you
that’s been gone much longer than you’ve been around,
so I guess I never really said hello in the first place.
Maybe I’ll see you around when you’re whole again,
but today I am leaving you behind, and
I cannot be sorry for that.
iii. I am enough.
You are a waste of a dragon, breathing nothing but
disappointment and humid air,
and swallowing dreams in the form of
counterfeit love, but I promise you
one day that acid will
leak out through your throat,
and I can’t fucking wait to watch you burn.
iv. Pull yourself together.
You never really said why you needed an escape,
you’ve just always had one.
I’m not quite sure what you’re running from
anymore (not that I ever was,)
but when Mondays and Saturdays both
end on the bathroom floor,
You might consider that it may have
more than caught up to you.
v. Thank you.
There are too many things that
even writers can’t put into words,
and this is one of them.
You are human and you are real and you understand, and
you say all the wrong things but
you stay up until two in the morning with me
just to say them.
You brought flowers to an almost-gravesight and
you left life where there was none.
(I’m just sorry I will never have enough to give back.)